I had the sort of hair you could do bugger all with. It stood up at the back if it was under a certain minimum length. It was dead straight and refused to do anything resembling a semi-descent hair style.
Through high school I tried spiking it, slicking it back, parting it in the middle, parting it on the side... My god I even think there might be a photo somewhere of me with something resembling a mullet. Oh, my mother also used to cut my hair.
God, I was cool.

I hated my hair.
Then, one day, I discovered clippers and the joys of shaving one’s head.

It’s fantastic. You can get out of bed in the morning and go out without even having to look in the mirror. You can wear motorbike or cycle helmets and never have to worry about Helmet Hair. You can go out on a windy day, impervious to what the elements can offer. You can walk past a barber shop and give them The Finger. “$40 hair cut?! Right here, buddy. Up Yours”.

Of course, my hairline has receded somewhat since I first started mowing my head. People assume this is actually the reason I shave my head. But let me just state for the record:

IT’S A HAIRSTYLE, GODDAMMIT. I CHOOSE TO DO THIS.

Still, be nice to have the option to grow it back again, should I so choose …

You all have these people to blame in one way or another for my (short) existence:

Hard News. The site will bore anyone without an interest in NZ news/politics. It is written by Russell Brown, aka the country's Most Opinionated Man.

I used to read all his stuff, until it got blocked by my company's Evil Winged Avenger Systems Monkeys. But before that option went bye-bye, he mentioned someone called the Naughty Milkmaid, a fellow NZer, who got written up in a national Sunday newspaper article about blogging.

She was my first real introduction into the blogging scene, and I was introduced to other journals through her site.

I used to prefer to just dump a steaming pile of smart arse in people's comment boxes, then move on.

Milky (who is no longer a Milkmaid, but is still Naughty) was trying her unsubtle best to get me to start blogging as well, but I'm a very lazy person and it just seemed like too much hard work. But I did start thinking about the possibility.

Then the Golf Widow (also in the Diarytown stable) became part of my daily read. She is funny like a clown. She tried getting me to get blogging by bribing me with the promise of lesbians. It worked. Mmmm, sweet lesbians...
GW also designed my site.

Basically:

"You are allowed to ask me up to four questions by posting them in the comments to this entry. You may ask anything. Nothing is off-limits as such, but I will caution that I won't answer questions I consider to be crude, rude, insensitive of other people's privacy, or stupid."