Pooh-poohing Pooh
Yesterday we held an intervention to get D-Girl off the two-year-old’s equivalent to Smack.But let me tell you, getting a child to give up recidivist Wiggles watching in exchange for something else would be a lot easier if that something else didn’t go by the name Winnie The Pooh.
Seeing as “Pooh” means the same as “poo” to a two-year-old.
Lovely. She thinks she’s watching a little yellow honey-loving turd…
(What the hell is a Pooh anyway?)
My daughter has this other annoying habit.You know how you go to parties and there’s all those chips and dips? My daughter loves dip.
She will get just one chip and then go about doing the whole double-dipping thing. Except by double dipping, I mean she does this 10 or 15 times. With the same soggy dip-sucked chip.
Which is why we now make sure she gets her own little exclusive container.
The really bad thing about her liking dip so much? Let’s just say I know where the phrase “dip-shit” comes from.
D-Missus is going away with some girl friends this weekend. Yesterday afternoon I listened to her talk on the phone with one of them, and they were all excited about arranging to get massages and “a facial”. Every time she said “facial”, I pissed myself laughing."Facial".
Giggle.
To make matters worse, I had to explain to her what a facial is*.
Apparently, I have now ruined beauty therapy for her. Forever.
* If you have no idea what I’m talking about, I refer you to Google.
D-Man Bites Dog does not recommend doing this during work time.
Actually, no, hang on - D-Man Bites Dog does recommend doing this during work time.
Bwahahahaaaa!!!!
